The one person in this Universe you should love more than anyone else, with the exception of God, is you. That means that you should always be good to yourself and always come first. Those who are mothers feel that their children’s needs come before their own, but an unhappy mother does not make a good one.
Now, I know that all this sounds greedy and boasting that you are the best; I will explain the feelings of Lord Buddha here:
“When Buddha, the World Honored One, declared: ‘I am the foremost throughout the threefold world,’ all the non-Buddhist leaders predicted that Heaven would surely punish him immediately, or that the earth would open up and swallow him. But no such thing happened. When someone is superior declares that he is superior, it may sound like arrogance, but that person will, in fact, receive great benefits because he is actually praising the Law which he embraces.”
I am neither greedy not boastful nor arrogant. To me, I am the best that could happen, other than “sliced bread.” I bring all this up based on an incident which happened to me and the lesson I learned from it. Because I live just above the poverty level, in subsidized housing, the amount of money I spend has always been important to me. I am trying to save as much as I can for a trip to Sedona, Arizona. Years ago, I was told by some spirits that in this life I “will have more money than I dreamed possible.” That was 9 years ago, and I am still waiting. I do know that everything in the Universe must be in the right place for that money to come, and I have learned the lesson of patience, so I wait. But that is not helping me now to have the money for the trip. I had started to save what I could, but one day I locked myself out of my apartment, and it cost me $182.00 for a locksmith. So, I start again.
When I got my Social Security check on April 3rd, I decided to spend some money in the purchase of a duvet for the comforter on my bed. It being white, I did not want it to become black with dirt. So, I walked to the shop in which I knew I would be able to buy one. It is necessary for me to interject here that the constant back pain I had for many months stopped New Year’s Eve 2007 when I asked God to stop the pain, and it stopped one hour after I finished my prayers, and it did not return until the day I went shopping for that duvet.
The salesperson placed my purchase in a shopping bag with a handle for easy transportation. It was a bit heavy, and I should have taken a taxi back home instead of walking, but I thought about all the money I had already spent, the trip to Sedona, so I decided to walk home. As I walked, the pain in my lower back “reared is ugly head” again, so I had to stop often to rest. My first stop was a bench on Broadway.
After I sat down, I took out a cigarette to smoke, and I saw the grimace on the face of a man sitting next to me. He said, ”It is people like you who are causing global warming.” My response was “And it is people like you who have made the world the way it is today.” He retorted, “Why don’t you do all of us a favor and kill yourself now instead of killing others.” If I explained to him that global warming is caused by all the negativity on this planet, he would think me deranged. So, I kept silent. I always try to avoid creating negative karma.
After several rest stops, I returned to my apartment. The pain in my lower back was intense and at the time of the writing of this chapter, three days later, the pain still persists. And all because I did not spend $4.00 to take a taxi home. What is that saying about being “pound foolish?”
All my life I was never a saver, and in the 1980’s when I was making a good deal of money, I spent it without thinking or caring. So, one day I asked God to send me the money as soon as possible. What I telepathically heard was “Blake, and what are you doing to save some money?” I expected the money to come without making any effort to make it happen. I knew that I am protected by God; therefore, I would never go hungry or live on the street. That knowledge, unfortunately, did not help my situation. Why didn’t I spend that extra $4.00 for a taxi to go home? Because of that, I am “paying the piper.” And as of this writing, I pray now that I have learned my lesson the pain would go away once again. And so, I went from being a spendthrift to being a miser, and where did that get me?
In loving myself and knowing to me that I am the best, should be enough to compensate for my miserly feelings. Here again, I realize that I am an imperfect human being living in a world of imperfect human beings, and so I worried about not having enough money for my trip. After all these revelations came to me, the worry disappeared. If I am meant to take that trip, the money will be there.
I live a very quiet life in the most expensive city in the world. I do not spend any money going out to restaurants to dine, seeing movies in theaters, drink alcoholic beverages. My one treat is to have breakfast in a restaurant once a month. When I go shopping, I try to spend as little as possible on groceries. I had even given up buying smoked salmon, which I really enjoy eating for breakfast, for it is too expensive. Why don’t I go to see a movie once in a while, have dinner in a restaurant once in a while? My priority is having enough cash for that trip, and even having the knowledge that if I am meant to go, I will, is not helping. Sometimes I feel that being human is a negative thing. Sure, money does not bring happiness, and I know I have found “true happiness” in this life, even being poor. Happiness cannot be found from another, having vast wealth. It comes from within.
We experience miracles every day, but we never see them as miracles. Just as soon as I finished typing all the words above, the pain in my back stopped. Obviously, God knew that I had learned another of life’s lessons, and He/She “rewarded” me.
I never compare my life to the lives of others. I have always felt, and still do, that the kind of life we have is based solely on all the good and bad karma we bring with us. If any readers of this book want to eliminate the negative karma, which is like a hump on his or her back, I will set down a simple prayer you can recite each morning. A word of caution here, though: just do not say the words but mean them, for the words will be both meaningless and useless if they are not meant when said.
“I pray that from the last time I said these words, all the bad karma that I created from a word, thought, action or deed in any of my past lives be eliminated.” It is simple to say; one must learn to believe them.
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